Restorative Justice: A Story

How do we define a community?

Or perhaps we should ask, how does our part in a community define us?

For some, it is a membership in a specific community, a sense of belonging amongst those with whom you share a characteristic or attribute.

For others, it’s a feeling of fellowship as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests and goals.

And then there are those that view community as a joint ownership or responsibility.

Those who take on life with those around them. Those that believe they need to leave their community better than it was when they found it. Those that see that a commitment to a community goes beyond the conventional attitude of temporarily residing there, that understand that it must be preserved, cared for, invested in, as if it would be a community later passed down to those they love.

This is the attitude of Darren Miller and his family who own the Fraser Valley’s iconic Castle Fun Park. A park that has been serving its community for over 34 years, Castle Fun Park and the family who own it have made responsibility for their community the cornerstone of their life’s work. “My father-in-law took a risk and started Castle Fun Park all those years ago, to bring family fun to Abbotsford. Since he first started, he’s been giving back to his community…always quietly, behind the scenes. He taught me that you always give back, and as much as you can. Not everyone can and so those who can, should.”

The park has seen its share of ups and downs as it has weathered time alongside its neighbours. In the recent floods of 2021, the park was devastated as an estimated 1.5 million gallons of water flooded in, destroying all three golf courses as well as their batting cages. It was after the floods had receded and the water pumped out that the park experienced a heartbreaking act of vandalism.

“My wife (Colleen) got a phone call early in the morning at 2a.m. that we’d had a break in. Based on the area where the alarms had been triggered, we confirmed they could send the APD in. Shortly after, we got a call that they had apprehended four people. Our apartment that had been close by had also been flooded and so we were driving in from Coquitlam. As soon as we got there and saw the individuals the police had apprehended, I noticed that these boys were rather young. They looked scared, they looked remorseful and being a counsellor in a high school for high risk youth, I was familiar with the concept of a restorative approach. So I asked about it.”

The principles of restorative justice encourage us to look at wrongdoing, criminal or not, as harm done to relationships and people, giving people, and therefore communities, an opportunity to look beyond traditional, punitive methods of problem solving.  Abbotsford Restorative Justice and Advocacy Association (ARJAA) is a non-profit organization that engages this community conflict outside of the traditional court system and is vitally concerned with finding innovative ways to impart restorative values and practices to the Abbotsford community. One of those ways is through a long-standing working relationship with the Abbotsford Police Department (APD). A department committed to making Abbotsford the safest city in British Columbia, the APD strives to refer to ARJAA where possible.

“Initially the officers were surprised by my knowledge of restorative justice but were open to making the referral. They quickly had the case sent over to ARJAA after that.”

Recognizing that a criminal and harmful act creates an obligation for things to be made right, a restorative justice process seeks to both give those harmed a voice within the reparative process, and to help give those who have harmed others an opportunity to make amends.  “The family asked me if I could be a part of the process on their behalf. They love their community,” Darren shares, “being a part of it, they feel a sense of responsibility for it, and are consistently giving back, quietly; as is their way. Based on my experience with youth, I was the best fit to participate in the process on behalf of everyone. After my initial meeting with the facilitators, I was able to meet the boys and their families. And so it was me, the facilitators, 8 parents and 4 kids. It was a full room. At first, there were a lot of eyes staring at the floor, and the parents wanting to speak on behalf of their kids. The facilitators made sure each person had their turn, but that the boys were given the space to speak for themselves, to be their own voices in the process. I could see the realization from them that their decisions had hurt others, but also could have really affected their future. They were grateful to have an opportunity to make amends versus having a criminal record--these were kids that just made a bad decision based on peer pressure.”

Something that came to light during this restorative process was a surprise to Darren and his family. The boys shared during the facilitation that kids at local schools had been sneaking in and out of Castle Fun Park since the water had been removed from the lower levels. “It had become this odd badge of honour if you could sneak in through our back door and take something to prove that you’d been there,” he explains. “I think that was actually the hardest realization throughout this whole process for us as a family. That kids-- that had grown up coming here-- were targeting the park this way. But the social hierarchy and peer pressure that exists in schools is very real. Here we had a chance to fix some of that while healing ourselves.”

Taking part in a restorative justice process is also about meeting the needs of the responsible party. It is not about creating shame or isolation. It is about offering high accountability and high support in a healthy process that holds responsible parties accountable for their behaviour, while providing them with the support they need to face those they have harmed and make meaningful amends. Facing one’s victim and having to answer for one’s actions and behaviour can be an extremely difficult and emotional process.

It is that high degree of support that allows the responsible party to connect with their community in a way that is re-integrative, rather than shaming or isolating.

And it is in that powerful encounter between victim and offender that empathy and understanding begin to grow.

To be given the opportunity to see one another beyond judgments, assumptions and labels creates connection.

And it is in this light that reconciliation and resolution can begin to take place.

As Darren and his family see it, “everyone has the potential for incredible goodness, but they also have the potential for destruction and we get both in a public place. We consistently saw clients disrespecting the space while it was open, hitting things with golf clubs in mini golf, that kind of thing. We choose to be patient and simply fix it because we know in a community you have to take the good with the bad. So we were used to being patient with these things. But this was an opportunity to address something in a healthy way that would benefit all of us, get these kids on the right track. What’s good for the youth in our community is good for all of us.”

Repairing harm isn’t easy, even for those like Darren who know what’s on the other side of that choice.

Healthier relationships.

Stronger communities.

But when we choose to move towards healing, of ourselves and of those who have caused us harm, we strengthen the ties that bind us. Like a bone once broken heals stronger, so do the relationships we have with those around us.

When we focus on promoting individual and collective responsibility, when we take into account histories, stories, what causes harm and what impacts come from it, we build equitable and healthy relationships amongst people, amongst social systems.

We create lasting change.

Part of the restorative justice process is the creation of a restorative justice agreement--a commitment designed by all parties involved in the process as a means of achieving restitution for those who have been harmed.

As part of their agreement, Darren and the youth chose volunteer hours spent repairing Castle Fun Park.

The youth came two at a time, for eight hours a day, and worked with Darren, cleaning, power washing and painting the stairwell they had broken into.

When asked about the experience of working side by side with these youth, Darren said he was grateful for the ability to have time with them and get to know them, while restoring a piece of the park so precious to his family. “Through restorative justice we were given the ability to choose teaching a lesson versus handing out a punishment. The parents were grateful and the kids chose a great attitude. It was important for me to treat them with respect, regardless of why we were there. I’d ask them periodically if they wanted a Gatorade and we bought them lunch while they were working. At first, that threw them off, like they were unsettled by being given kindness from someone they had harmed. But I think that’s part of that lesson too. By the end they were looking me in the eye, giving me a firm handshake.”

As Darren explains it, the lesson was learned, but the shame was removed; showing kindness and respect was a lesson all on its own.

“Having the opportunity to sit down with these kids, to work beside these kids, we could find out who they were outside of them just being the individuals who snuck into our property to steal. We felt the right lesson was being taught. That was healing for our family in itself.”

As the interview drew to a close, Darren shared one last thing--his only encounter with any of the youth since his restorative justice process with them. “The night before this interview, I actually ran into one of the boys at an event that I was attending. He was working and I went up to say hello. He gave me a solid handshake and looked me right in the eye, confidently, respectfully. It was great to see him doing so well. And I thought to myself, this is why we did it.”

*Abbotsford Restorative Justice and Advocacy Association is incredibly grateful to Darren Miller and his family for allowing us to tell their story. Story telling has an incredible impact on our communities and we appreciate every opportunity we are given by participants to do so.*

Written by Darcy Halber, ARJAA Communications Specialist